LADIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIES AAAAAAAAAAAAND GENTLEMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!

The FOUR RIGHT WING WACKOS are PROUD to announce…..

(drumroll, please!)

THE CARNIVAL OF THE VANITIES!

(Episode 74, for those who are counting. Yeah, you in the back, you know who you are)

Our fine men and women will dazzle you with their vocabulary, thrill you with their audacity, and amaze you with their wit! Just sit right back, kick your feet up, and open your mind to the words and wisdom of the finest minds ever collected in ONE! SINGLE! PLACE! Please be patient, as these fine people are just begging to share their talents with you! We have fit as many of them into this event as we could.

To ensure that this goes smoothly, we ask that you save your questions and comments for later. In fact, we’ve insured that you have to save your comments for later by turning off the comment feature while the Carnival is running! It may seem annoying, but waiting an hour for the page to load due to overloaded comments would be even more annoying, yes?

Let’s start the ball rolling with a cavalcade of current events! The Pundits of Election Year Politics have unleashed the ink from their pens, and produced one of the most spectacular efforts in years. Porphyrogenitus takes on the Democratic debating tactics, while Feste exposes the failures of the Democratic National Security Plan.

And what would current events be without the most recent updates into the election spectrum? For you, my dear audience, we have the current cannonade at Kerry, the seeming front-runner in the Democratic Primaries. FIRE AT WILL!

The Smarter Cop lays a barrage on the junior senator from Massachusetts, while the Gleeful Extremist acts as the Forward Observer to the Kerry Intern rumors. Speaking of those rumours, Dustin Frelich narrows his aim to the press in regards to the coverage, with supporting fire from Fried Man. Not to be outdone, QandO fires a barrage of his own at the Ketchup King!

If I may now move your attention to the combatants armed and ready to go, with logic as their shield and truth as their weapons…. Watch them battle the tides of falsehood and deception in THE CULTURE WARS!

Snooze Button Dreams has a solution to PETA’s call not to eat beef, and Dustbury provides a flanking assault to accompany it. The People’s Republic of Seabrook hands out it’s DUMB@$$ AWARD (and don't ask what it looks like! You don't want to know!). Blogo Slovo helps define what it means to be American, while Confessions of a Political Junkie takes on those who would like to “ban” gay marriage. The Declarer remarks on the inconsistencies of the political debate in regards to international action. Discriminations joins in melee with the Left on Campus, and the Colorado Conservative write a lament for someone who died too young. SondraK tells you of her experience into THE OTHER SIDE (And continuing the trip is well worth it!), and last but not least, Dean’s World brings a focus onto a few differences between Occidental and Oriental cultures.

This is but a few of the wonders you will see here at the Wacko’s Retreat! Mike (and his family) describe their worship at the Temple of Food (where I pray as often as possible!), and Andrew Ian Dodge invites YOU to spread your own creative wings! Where else can you get such satisfaction but THE CARNIVAL!

Don’t think that our fine writers and performers are relegated to a few sundry political groups! Oh no, my gentle people, we have thinkers from all over the blogosphere, relegating their talents for your entertainment! Observe as they mesmerize you with their gifts of elucidation!

Undercaffinated remarks on the fact that outsourcing jobs, while it may be the talk of the town, doesn’t seem to have a future in many areas. Desertlightjournal remarks on the cause of Domestic Violence, and offers a few suggestions. Sneakeasy’s Joint informs you of a scam going on in the artistic community, and Bad Money offers a formula for successful blogging.

But let’s clear your mind now, and prepare yourself for the EXTRORDINARY works of those who’s minds are obviously on a different plane at this moment… Relax, enjoy the swirling colors and mind-bending masterpieces of the finest writers the world has to offer!

Quibbles and Bits lets his feelings out about Barbie breaking up with Ken. Pete pens an ode to being single, while another Pete regales us with his longing for someone to stalk him (I'm from Seattle, Sir. Talk to me after the Carnival, and I'll hook you up!). Da Goddess lays down a challenge, while Leaking Pure White Noise announces that he does indeed rock! Interested Participant informs us of yet a new strange law who’s tongue twisting application will leave you stunned!.

What’s that, you say? You want more politics? Very well, you shall have it! For we aim to please at the Right Wing Retreat!

Useful Fools reveals the damage done in the Democrat’s hurry to hurt President Bush, and PC Watch lays the whip to Britain’s court system. The Smallest Minority also zeros in on Britain, but focuses on the Camera System that is in place. Don’t forget, it's Step Step Step TURN and WINK! Make LOVE to the camera, as they say on the runway in New York! Free Will Blog unloads on our neighbors up North, and doesn’t pull any punches! Meanwhile, Baby Troll Blog (ah, that red hair! That fiery temper! You know you love it!) does a masterful job of explaining why Marxism is simply WRONG. Drake’s Drum shines a spotlight on recent imposters floating around the blogosphere, and Dissecting Leftism… well, the name should say it all, shouldn’t it?

And what would a Carnival be without views from all over? Mr. Brayton gives us his opinion on gay marriage, and Mr. Dunlop has an issue with the recent interview given by the President on National TV.

And finally, the Royal Jester, the King of Fools, sends you to a place to calm your nerves, quiet the voices, and relax your mind after such a fantastic display!

Ah, but the time runs short, and we can’t stay here all day…. So I bid you good-day, and many thanks for stopping by the home of the FOUR RIGHT WING WACKOS!

For anyone that did not get included, my apologies. I know for a fact that my computer at home garbled at least two links, and I was forced to remove them. I tried to include as much as I could without overloading Blogspot.

Once again, thank you for stopping by, and don't forget that next week's Carnival is being hosted by she of the lovey face, fair skin, and magnificent mind... DA GODDESS!

THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT!