Saturday, September 24, 2016

Just as the Founders intended!

So, I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the Founding Fathers intended.  So imagine this scenario:

Four ruffians break into my house.

"What the Devil?" I sputter as I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle.  Take aim at the first scaliwag, blow a golf-ball sized hole through his chest, he's dead on the spot.

Draw my pistol on the second man, misses him entirely because it's a smoothbore and nails the neighbor's dog.

I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape-shot.  "TALLY-HO, LADS!" as the grape-shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel flying through the air set off car alarms all throughout the neighborhood.

I fix my bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion.  He bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up.

Just as the Founders intended.

2 comments:

Drumwaster said...

The Second Amendment is limited to muzzle-loaders and flintlocks in exactly the same way that the First is limited to hand-cranked printing presses and quill feather pens.

Windy Wilson said...

What Drumwaster said.
And if the Second Amendment only applies to the National Guard, then the First Amendment only applies to the Government Printing Office.

Tam Slick calls this "telling Jokes to Aspies."

Funny story, though.