Because she has to put up with my BS. She just got done making some Monte Christo-type sammiches for lunch, and topped them with an over-easy egg. So we sat down to eat some lunch.
Me: Yeah, this is a really good Monte Carlo type sammich!
Her: Christo. Monte Christo.
Me: Oh, right. Carlo is the car, Christo is the sammich.
Her: Just think of the Count.
Me: What does Sesame Street have to do with a sammich?
Her: ......
Me: ONE! ONE husband beaten with a rolling pin! Ah ah ah aaaaaaaah!
Her (rubbing her forehead): I love you, honey.
I'm going to a friend's house this afternoon for good food and good company. Apparently they'll be watching a football game too. I'll be outside with a cigar and a glass of brandy, because fuck the NFL sideways with a chainsaw. The biggest problem I have with the Super Turd Bowl is that someone is going to win it.
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