Sometimes the Truth Hurts

The Myth of Unemployment in America

I am thirty-one years old and have never been unemployed. Let me qualify that statement: I have never been involuntarily unemployed. Every time I needed a job, it never took me longer than a week to find one. I looked in the "Help Wanted" section of my local newspaper, called to arrange interviews, and usually within a few days found myself hired. Some jobs paid better than others, some required physical labor, and most required long hours. But they all fulfilled the most important criteria of employment: they allowed me to pay my bills and keep Uncle Sam's well-chewed titty out of my mouth.

Yes, welfare bums, that was a slur aimed at you. For all of you out there on the dole (which is to say, on MY nickel), complaining about how you lost your job and you can't find work, my advice is this - GET OFF YOUR ASS. If you're on your sixth month of unemployment benefits, it's not that you can't find work, it's that you're in hiding, hoping that work doesn't find YOU. The excuse "There are no jobs out there" is bullshit. I defy anyone to show me a newspaper from any sizable American town with an empty "Help Wanted" section. The excuse at this point usually morphs to "Well, there are no good jobs out there."

Now we're getting somewhere. You're too good to drive a truck, cut grass, clean toilets, cook food, wash dishes, or paint houses, but you're not too good to accept handouts indefinitely. So, if that Wal-Mart greeter job paid $40,000 per year, you could conceivably be bothered to apply for it, but until that day, you'd rather Uncle Sugar just took some of my money and handed it over to you. So what you're really saying is that you don't want a JOB, you want a CHECK.

Bingo. I have never taken a dime of unemployment money, not even when I was laid off. Because I frigging WORK! And as long as it'll pay the bills, I'll do it! And if I don't like the job, I'll keep job searching, and looking for a way to improve my life, but dammit I'm gonna be working my ass off at the same time! I. Will. Pay. My. Rent. And I will do it by my OWN damn sweat and blood.

Trust me, you'll want to read the entire thing.

Hat tip to Random Nuclear Strikes.