Windows Vista is a virus

So anyways, here I am with my laptop, which is running Windows Vista. I'm not all that happy with it, but recently it's been slowing down even more than usual. So I go in, try to find out just why my computer is acting so horribly. My first thought was "Ah crap, I've got a virus". But after digging around, checking out the task manager, you want to know why my computer is so damned slow?

Because of Windows Vista. It's all Microsoft Applications. I don't have a virus. I've run a scumware check over and over with SpyBot Search and Destroy. I've scanned my computer over and over with McAfee. I have found just what is sucking up all my resources. It is Windows Vista itself. There's no virus. There's no scumware. Windows Vista IS THE SCUMWARE! My CPU is maxed out, my memory is maxed out, it takes thirty seconds to get Firefox to load, and it's all because of Windows Vista! My computer takes five or ten minutes to boot up in the morning, and it's because Windows Vista sucks so bad. Every action that occurrs on this computer is taking so long that I will literally direct my computer to do something, and then just WALK AWAY, because I know nothing will get done for ten minutes.

WINDOWS VISTA IS A VIRUS! It is SCUMWARE!

Anyone know how to get Linux up and operating on a Compaq laptop? Because I'm friggin' done. I'm so pissed off at Microshaft Winblows right now that I can't see straight. I never want to use another Microshaft product. Maybe if they start losing billions of dollars, they'll come out with an operating system that people can actually operate.

You know what it's like? It's like driving a car that has one vacuum hose loose. Yeah, the thing runs, but it doesn't run well.