My weekend

Let me set the scene. I'm in the kitchen, preparing ingredients for chicken wings. The TV is set to ESPN, and I'm listening to come commentator blather on about all the football that's coming up this weekend. I have a beer in my hand, and it's not even noon yet. Oh yes, I'm ready for some (college) football.

Got it? Good. Because here's how my weekend went after that.

PHONE: Ring! Ring!

ME: %$#@&^!

PHONE: Ring! Ring!

ME: (Checking to see who it is - it's friends of the Raging Mrs. and I, who will henceforth be referred to as John and Jane. And as far as I know, John isn't into college football like I am.)

PHONE: Ring! Ring!

ME: (answering phone) Hey Jane, what's going on?

JANE: (with trepidation, because she knows what my plans are) Hey Dave... um..... are you busy?

ME: Um.... football... chickenwings... beeeeeeer.

JANE: Because you know that AC evaporator that John needs to replace?

ME: Um.... football? Chickenwings? BEER!

JANE: The thing is, he's got the dashboard off, but he's at the point where he needs some help, and he's starting to cuss in the garage...

ME: (whimpering) Football..... beer.... hotwings. Beer.

JANE: ....and I didn't know who else to call, and if this thing doesn't get done I won't have a vehicle, because there's parts all over the garage.....

ME: (crying) See you in half and hour.

Now, let's move to John and Jane's garage, where John and I are just now finding out where the damn bolts are situated for the AC/Heater core -

DAVE / JOHN: %$#@&^!

So yeah. Saturday? Under the hood. Sunday? Same 'ol, same 'ol. Two days, and I swear to god that if one more thing had gone wrong with that vehicle I would have towed it behind my truck and dumped it into San Juan Bay. It's a damn good thing that John has mad skillz yo, because at one point we had to haul out the welding cart and re-weld nuts back into place. Well, OK, John did the welding while I stood back and held a flashlight. After all, it's HIS damn vehicle we were working on. I also found out that there's nothing like Fast Orange to find every last little nick, scratch and cut on your hands when you're cleaning up. I did get some tasty dinners out of it all. But still......

I didn't watch a single damn bit of football either Saturday or Sunday. And hotwings? Hell no, those are still sitting in my freezer. Beer? Still sitting in my pantry, waiting for the cool kiss of ice to chill them to perfection. Which won't be today.

John and Jane owe me. Oh, they owe me big, and that tab will be around for a good loooooooooooooooong time.