A hard truth

Over at the Anchoress, I saw this link of "Casual sex is a con". I know I've spoken a bit before on this subject, but what the hell, why not bring it up again?

The Sixties generation thought everything should be free. But only a few decades later the hippies were selling water at rock festivals for $5 a bottle. But for me the price of “free love” was even higher.

I sacrificed what should have been the best years of my life for the black lie of free love. All the sex I ever had — and I had more than my fair share — far from bringing me the lasting relationship I sought, only made marriage a more distant prospect.

And I am not alone. Count me among the dissatisfied daughters of the sexual revolution, a new counterculture of women who are realising that casual sex is a con and are choosing to remain chaste instead.

This is all part of a big lie foisted on people by "progressives" who saw the moral establishment of the day as nothing more than something to be torn down. For what reasons, I don't know. I have my opinions on that, but I'm not going to go into them right now. But much like the lie of "You can have a family AND work at the same time!" the mantra of "free sex" I think has done more damage to society than we know, or can even caculate right now.

Men and women are different creatures. Anyone who doubts that need only look at which commercials are aimed at men, and then compare them to commercials aimed at the female demographic. We are two sides of the same coin, yes, and without both sides, the coin becomes worthless. But by trying to erase the differences between the sexes, the modern feminist movement has also erased what makes women special. This essay is from a woman's perspective, so I'm not going to expound upon her view very much. But I'll give you a guy's view. And let me say this right now. I can in no way give a full explination of why I think that cheap sex is a bad idea. I don't have that kind of time right now. Perhaps later I'll write out the four-page essay that it would require. As for right now, a decent length post will suffice.

Casual sex, from a man's point of view, is great. We get what we want with no strings attached, point blank. I say this as a former philanderer who has spend more than his share of time in bed with various women. But the effects of casual sex take it's toll on men and women in different ways. When men are looked upon as un-neccessary, and are treated as living sex objects, then that is what men will become. Look, I'm a guy, and I'm going to say it flat out - if you free a man from responsibility, give him unfettered access to women's bodies with no regrets, then a man will happily go around screwing anything with two tits, a hole, and a heartbeat. Be a father? Why? We only had sex! Be responsible? Why? That's not what you wanted when you climbed into my bed! Commit to a relationship? Why? I only want sex, and if you're not going to give it to me, I'll dump you and find another sperm receptical!

Women who try to attract men with just their bodies quickly find out that it's only your body we're interested in.

By making cheap, casual sex the norm, you have effectively removed all responsibility from the men you have sex with. Not only that, but you've devalued yourself. You've turned yourself into nothing more than some place for men to ejaculate into. Cheap sex means you're not a woman, you're just an object with which we can sate our lust for the time being, and maybe have a beer with from time to time.

Does that seem harsh? I hope so. What I think that most women don't understand is that the most civilizing force on the face of this earth is a woman. Sure, men may have made a great deal of noise about clubbing a mastadon on the head and dragging it back to the cave, but it's a simple fact that he brought it to the cave because a woman was there. Mankind is a brute, elemental force. We are physically stronger than women, faster than women, and for the most part, more brutal and aggresive. We are the ones that went out and killed things to eat, because we could. We're the ones who built things, because we had the physical strength to do so. We're the ones who protected the home and hearth, because we're built for it.

But somewhere along the way, society forgot about what a woman brings to the relationship. It's a woman who can take that primal strength and channel it to something useful. It's a woman who can take a man's wild energy and direct it. As I said before, free a man from his responsibilities, and he'll happily go around screwing anything that moves. It's a woman who gives a man a reason NOT to go around like a rutting billygoat.

By treating your body as nothing more than a pleasure factory, something to be given away for a night of supposed fun, you pretty much toss all that away. Part of what made sex special was that it wasn't something you could just go out and have. It was part of what made marriage special as well. Shall we look at what has happened to marriage in the "If it feels good, do it" era?

Now, I don't think that society's preoccupation with easy sex is the one and only reason for the problems that we face today. However, it is one that has far reaching consequences, and is intertwined with many other reasons. There is no one thing we can point at and say "THIS is why things are going to hell!"

But like a turd in a pool, cheap sex keeps rising to the top of the various problems we have.