Day by Day

Friday, March 09, 2007

recipe to be a good American IE KICK THEIR ASS!!!

How To Be A Good Civilian:
Supporting Our Nation and Its Military Personnel

The current state of affairs in our great nation has many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those who can't join up, you can still lend a hand. Here are just a few areas where we would like your support and assistance:

1. The next time you see an adult talking (or wearing his hat) during the playing of our National Anthem – kick his ass.

2. When you witness – firsthand – someone burning the American Flag in protest – kick his ass.

3. Regardless of rank held while serving our Country, pay the highest amount of respect to all military veterans, especially those few remaining from WWII. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every minute of every day. Enlighten them on the many untold sacrifices veterans have made to make this Nation so great. Then hold them down while a disabled veteran kicks their ass.

4. If you were never served in the military, DO NOT pretend that you did. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDUs) or jungle fatigues, telling others that you used to be "Special Forces" and collecting GI Joe memorabilia, might have been okay when you were seven years old. Now, it only makes you look stupid...and, likely, will get your ass kicked.

5. Next time you come across an active member of the U.S. Air Force, do not ask, "Do you fly a fighter jet?" Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance deserves an ass-kicking (children are exempt).

6. If you witness someone calling the U.S. Coast Guard "non-military", inform them of their mistake – and kick his ass!

7. Next time you see Old Glory pass by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by removing your cap and placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her – of course, failure to do either of these could earn you a severe ass-kicking.

8. Don't try to "fix" political problems by discussing them with a military member or a veteran. We are Americans and we all bleed the same regardless of our party affiliation. Our Chain of Command includes our Commander-In-Chief (CinC). The President (for those who don't know) is our CinC regardless of political party. We have no inside track on what happens inside those big important buildings where all those representatives meet. All we know is that when those civilian representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the military to go straighten it out. If you keep asking us the same stupid questions time after time, you will get your ass kicked!

9. "Your mama wears combat boots" never made any sense. Stop saying it! If she really did, she would most likely be a vet and, therefore, could kick your ass.

10. Bin Laden and the Taliban are not Communists, so stop saying "Let's go kill those Commies!" And stop asking where he is hiding! Crystal balls are not standard issue in the military. That reminds me – if you hear of anyone calling those damn psychic phone numbers, let me know, so I can go kick their ass!

11. "Flyboy" (Air Force), "Jarhead" (Marines), "Grunt" (Army), "Swabby" (Navy), "Puddle Jumpers" (Coast Guard), etc., are terms of endearment we use to describe each other. Unless you are a military service member or veteran, you have not earned the right to use them. Doing so could get your ass kicked.

12. Last, but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends, always remember that there are literally thousands of soldiers, sailors, marines and airmen far from home wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our Country would get its ass kicked.


It's the Veteran, NOT THE REPORTER, who has given you the freedom of the press.

It's the Veteran, NOT THE POET, who has given you the freedom of speech.

It's the Veteran, NOT THE CAMPUS ACTIVIST, who gives you the freedom to demonstrate.

It is our military who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the PROTESTER to burn the flag.

Oh, and one more thing: If you ever see anybody singing the National Anthem in Spanish – KICK THEIR ASS!

“Our country! In her intercourse with foreign nations may
she always be in the right; but our country, right or wrong.”
Stephen Decatur, US Navy 1779-1820

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