Day by Day

Monday, February 13, 2006

Cheney's hunting accident

OK, so the VP goes on a hunting trip and accidentally shoots one of his hunting partners. He doesn't let the press know for 24 hours. The press goes apeshit.

Yawn.

You want to know why the press went apeshit? Because they missed an opportunity to embarass the VP on a Sunday, when they have the most people reading their newspapers. THAT is why Scott McClellan was subjected to one gigantic temper tantrum thrown by the worthless goat-fucking peons that make up the White House press briefings.

Any organization that has Helen Thomas sitting front and center doesn't deserve one bit of respect.

Here's my question: Why should the VP give one damn thing to the press when all they've done for six years is villify him to an extent not seen since Richard Nix on? Cheney and his group was rather busy getting his buddy to the hospital (where he's making a rather nice recovery, btw). I'm sure that he had better things to do than report an accident to a group of vultures who would only use the news to make him look bad in newspapers nationwide.

You know how I know that the White House press corps are a bunch of brain-dead ass cannons? Because every time they say "I have one question" they immidiately fire off more than one. If they can't count, you know they can't be too smart. It's not that hard. You can do it on one hand. Look, watch me. "ONE!" (and I'm sticking out my thumb as I count, really I am.) See? Easy. But the reporters in the White House don't seem to be able to handle simple math. I can't say I'm surprized.

What really makes me laugh is all the people coming up with their tin-foil hat theories. "CHENEY WAS TRYING TO KILL HIM!" Right, because as every good hunter knows, birdshot at thirty feet is SOOOOOOOO lethal! And if that didn't work, Cheney was gonna give the guy a really bad purple nurfel! Not to make light of the guy's injuries, but for pete's sake, the people claiming that Cheney was trying to kill the guy are mental rejects! Riding the short bus to their special "skool"!

The bottom line in all of this is that the press once again showed just how biased and worthless they are. Personally, if I were the President and VP, I'd just stop having press conferences. Seriously, I'd end them all. "Yeah, I know you people think you're important, but get the fuck off my lawn. 'Ol Dick is mean with a shotgun, as I'm sure you all know, and that fucker is loaded with rocksalt." At this point "reporter" is synonomous with "lawyer" in terms of how little respect those professions deserve.

And I'm talking miniscule here, baby. Microscopic. When someone announces that they're a reporter, I immidiately know that they are college rejects who couldn't get a real job if their life depended on it. If they weren't working at a newspaper, they'd be flipping burgers when they were 35. Hell, maybe all the way into their forties. Those that can, do. Those that can't, teach. Those that can't teach, report.

Has anyone checked to see if Helen Thomas is actually alive, or are her body movements just the result of gasses from decomposition?

So anyways, the only thing the press did this weekend was show how important they THINK they are. The rest of us with more than half a brain understand that they're nothing more than bloviating fucktards who don't have enough IQ to tie their shoes without help.

You know what I call a White House press briefing? A target rich environment. Oh yeah, baby. C'mon you little bastards, I got your "Next Question" right here!

Can you tell that I'm running on no sleep? Damn, I thought so.

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