Thursday, October 27, 2005

The Pleasure of Your Acquaintance

Hello, this is Helen.

After years of almost daily pestering, I was able to convince Tim that you deserve the right to experience my charm, wit, and extensive gardening experience. Finally, he relented. So here we go.

I am a Compassionate Conservationist, working to save the environment, and writing from the arctic rain forest of Northern Vermont. If you are curious, you can view a picturesque introduction that reveals far more than anyone could possibly want to know.

I mention gardening because it is the most interactive puzzle ever conceived. It occupies a lot of my little Summer and consumes huge quantities of my cash. It's my gymnasium, my pallet, and my classroom. Each plant variety comes with its own rules. Each micro-ecosystem is constantly changing and demanding attention.

Every pest imposes a unique threat. Some can be ignored for a while or thinned. Some need to be regularly weeded out. Others are best crushed on sight. Sorry for the abrupt change of topics--I'm talking about politics now.

For those of you who don't keep a garden, please consider it as great opportunity to better understand human society. Disinterest, wishful thinking, inaction lead directly to disaster. Each season produces new waves of weeds, and bugs, and Leftists. I know, it's not fair. However, the garden's truth is irrefutible. If we don't keep after them, there is no hope for growing the Cornucopia of America.

Thank you for your interest. I look forward to chatting with you on many issues. H

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